Marriage, like any relationship, changes a little over time. Once both partners are in their 50’s, changes in both the relationship and in life can put strain on a marriage. Use these top successful marriage tips to maintain a happy marriage after 50.
For many couples, once you reach your 50s, you’ve been married for many years – or possibly even decades. With that much time together, you both have likely changed to some degree. And now you’re entering a period of your life that’s filled with even more change: children are grown and out of the house and maybe there’s a major job change or even retirement.
Truth be told, this may be the period where you have spent the most time together since, well, ever. And with so many years together, you know your partner almost better than you know yourself. It’s easy at this point to grow apart or let the marriage relationship become flat and wither away to nothing.
Related Post: Marriage Over 50 – 7 Signs That it May Be Over
However, I think that your 50s are the perfect time to rekindle your relationship and let the fires of passion burn bright again. Here are some powerful happy marriage tips to help you add some spice back into your relationship.
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Powerful Successful Marriage Tips to Keep the Love Alive After 50
Whether you’ve been with your spouse for 20+ years or you’re finding new love, you can always boost your relationship skills. Use these tips to help keep your hearts fluttering for each other as you enter your 50s and beyond.
Be Kind
Marriage is a unique relationship in that you see each other at your worst (and your best). You’ve crashed the car, said terrible things to each other, been horribly sick, burned dinners, and more. But you’ve also shared amazing experiences together, raised kids, and maybe traveled parts of the world.
As you face life (and relationship) changes, remember that your partner is a person and deserves your kindness, patience, and tolerance. Even when they leave their smelly socks out for the millionth time or forget to put that borrowed item away.
Think about your words before you say them. Even when you have a frustration to air, choose a kind and loving way to do it. Your partner is your best friend – treat them that way.
Keep Communication Strong
This tip sounds like obvious, cliché advice. However it’s cliché because it’s true. It’s important to communicate the large – and the small – with your spouse. Talk about dinner plans, the phone bill you forgot to pay, your friends, and even how you’re feeling in the relationship.
However, good communication isn’t just about speaking up. Listening has just as big of a place in successful marriage tips as talking does. One of the most important things you can do during a disagreement is to listen to your partner. If listening is difficult for you, try to focus on finding the commonalities rather than differences and work to find a solution that works for both of you.
There will be ebbs and flows in the relationship, and it’s important to talk about them along the way so that you can work together to find a great solution.
Share Yourself Openly and Honestly
A happy marriage requires that you share yourself with your spouse: what you think, how you feel, what you want and what you believe. By the same token, listen and learn about your partner and continue to grow together.
You may find it hard to be honest about certain things, but it’s vital that you do it anyway. Even if you feel angry or ashamed about something.
Nurture Friendships
Your spouse is your best friend – and should be your primary relationship. But your marriage shouldn’t be the only relationship in your life. Foster and nurture platonic relationships by having weekends away with friends to enjoy new experiences and come back as a more interesting partner for your spouse.
Choose Your Battles With Care
When you’ve been together for this long, you both likely know exactly how to push your partner’s buttons and have at least a few grievances in your history. The best happy marriage tips include not addressing every single perceived problem.
Not every slight is intentional. Sometimes the best way to handle an issue is to choose not to handle it. Bite your tongue and let it go (really let it go, don’t let it fester). Forgive. Forget. And move on.
If you need to bring up an issue, make sure that it’s one that really needs addressing – and do it in a loving way. Then let everything else go.
Be Quick to Forgive
We all mess up. And no one feels safe, secure, or loved when their spouse throws past mistakes in your face.
When your spouse messes up, whether it’s spending too much money or backing the car into the (closed) garage door, forgive them and move on because that’s what you would want if the situation was reversed.
Some of the very best successful marriage tips include kindness, openness, and forgiveness.
Be Thoughtful and Appreciative
People tend to take for granted those that we love the most. It’s this false sense of security that we can take advantage of someone we love and they will get over it. Instead of coming home from a bad day and taking it out on your spouse, try to give your spouse the best part of you.
What can you do for your partner to make their day a little better? Being thoughtful might mean doing things from time to time that you hate (like sitting through a chick flick or going fishing), simply because your spouse loves it.
The pastor that married us gave us this warning. He said, “Wake up every morning, asking yourself the same question. What can I do to make her/his day better?” It really stuck with both of us. We have tried to live by that every day since. Trust me when I tell you it does not happen every day. But we do try.
As you’re trying to do these gestures for your partner, also work to recognize and appreciate (communicate it!) when your partner does the same thing for you.
Recognize There Will Be Peaks and Valleys
In every single relationship, there are ebbs and flows because life itself has ups and downs. We all go through personal periods of difficulty and periods of joy. Relationships do the same thing.
One week you may find that you treasure your spouse so much you can’t bear the thought of life without them. And the next week, that very same person annoys you so much you don’t think you can bear life with them. It happens to everyone.
The important thing is knowing that neither place will last forever and successful marriages spend most of their time somewhere in the middle. That middle ground is the precious meat of the relationship where you practically know what the other person is going to do before they do it.
Make Time For Just the Two Of You
Yes, you may be with each other more than you ever have, but keep the romance alive by doing special things together. Go on dates, have weekend getaways, go on a romantic vacation. Dress up for your spouse. Surprise your partner with that special item you know they’ve been wanting.
Appreciate your partner and show it through gestures as well as communicating in other ways.
Final Thoughts on Successful Marriage Tips For a Happy Marriage After 50
“Marriage is easy”, said no one ever. And while it’s not easy, I find that we appreciate the most those things which require the most effort and sacrifice. Marriage certainly falls into that category with happy couples being quick to tell you it wasn’t easy but it was 100% worth the effort. As life in your 50s brings changes to your relationship, use these successful marriage tips to help you stay on track so you can enjoy the best phase of your marriage thus far.
52 responses to “9 Successful Marriage Tips to Keep the Love Alive After 50”
These are wonderful tips for keeping the love alive! Whats great is you can apply these to anytime in your marriage. Thank you for the reminders! 😉
Thank you Trisha! I agree that at any point in marriage this is helpful.
These are excellent suggestions. My husband and I have really developed our personal lives and feel the freedom to allow the other to pursue what brings them joy. However, we’ve also discovered new things that we both enjoy and we do those things together. The biggest challenge for us is communicating deeper needs and perspectives, something we’ve never been good at. We are working on that this year.
I love that Cindy. Thank you for sharing your story. I agree that communicating deeper needs is more difficult. For me, I did not even realize what those needs were. Then it just hit me. I started communicating those a little over a year ago but it has been slow going. We are working on it as well this year.
These are really great tips. Keeping the love alive later on in life can be tough. We’re going on 29 years!
Anyone who has been married for more than 20 years knows the challenges. Thanks Kendra!
Just read this again. My husband died when I was 60 (he was 56). Our marriage was fine, but I’ve gotta say, finding love after 60 (more than 50, I’m sure) is pretty challenging. A friend of mine says that dating after 60 is like trying to pick out the least disgusting thing at the garbage dump!
Excellent tips here; enjoy, and cherish what you have while you have it.
That is a great reminder. When I frustrated with my husband, I learned early on to focus on the good things he brings to the relationship. I feel for single women at any age but over 50 especially. Our rabbi has plans to build a community for our elderly senior women so they have a tight-knit community.
Great marriage tips to keep love alive! So important to pick your battles.
That seems to be a popular theme!
These are all so important. Marriage can be hard, and all of these little things add up
Especially over the long term. It is important to keep things in check.
amazing! Thanks! This made me smile….my husband just turned 50 a couple months ago!
Congrats! Everything changes after 50! I love this new chapter, hopefully, you will too.
My husband and I have been married nearly 13 years. It has been a wonderful ride, but with three little kids it’s important now more than ever to keep our communication open and to forgive more readily.
Most days will be not be balanced with littles. It is important at this time to take time alone with each other.
My husband and I are just over 50 so I appreciate these tips! We’ve been married for 31 years!!!
Congrats! To many more!
These are great successful marriage tips! I especially love the one that talks about nurturing friendships. I really wish my husband had other friends besides just me.
I think it is important to miss each other once in a while too. Having outside relationships helps you to be less co-dependent.
Great marriage tips! I think it is so easy to take your spouse for granted, and just reading these tips reminds me of the things I can do to stop that!
Awesome! Thanks, Pam!
Very true and valuable ideas, and great advice. It’s important to stay present.
I did chuckle a couple of times, because your examples were specific enough that I thought they may have happened (backed the car into the closed garage door? 😉).
Haha! I will never tell!
Love these tips! Often when I’m upset, it has more to do with me than my husband!
We can only change our own behavior. It is important to always be looking at our own behaviors as well! Thanks, Tiffany!
Perfect advice for every stage of life.
Thanks Sandra!
Marriages take work, so these are some great reminders about ways to nurture the relationship. Sometimes we get complacent after being together for so many years, so its nice to find ways to reconnect in a positive manner.
Absolutely! Thanks Marianne!
Some wonderful tips!
Thanks Suzan!
So true to keep communicating. Sometimes I just tell my husband the silliest things because it’s important to make sure we feel like we are part of each other lives.
Great tip Leeanne!
Great reflections for both the over 50 and slightly under 50 crowd!
Thanks Tiffany!
Great marriage tips & advice. Communication is a huge one and picking the battles.
Thanks Keirsten! We all need these reminders!
These are great marriage tips! I love the points to keep the friendship and communication going!
Friendship has carried my marriage for 25 years!
I like the idea of tying to make each other’s day better daily.
Our pastor gave us that valuable piece of advice. It has served us well!
These are awesome marriage tips, and applicable for any stage! Communication is so important!
Thanks Alexis!
Great advice. We have an unusual marriage, in that we spend ALL of our time together. We have even worked together for most of our almost 12-year relationship. It works for us, but it is not without its challenges. Honesty is key. Once when we were having some difficulties, my husband asked “do you forgive me?” I was not there yet. The best answer I could come up with was “I will.” It expressed how I felt at the moment, but also acknowledged that we would move forward in due time.
We have worked together in the past as well. Understanding your differences is important, with the freedom to be able to be true to your authentic self. It may take you more time but you got there. That is what matters!
Great tips and advice! A stronger connection and ability to be eack others best friend can make every marriage magical!
Yes! I know he will always have my back and vice versa. I did not have that in my first marriage.
These are great tips for a successful marriage after 50. We had to relearn a few things after we became emptynesters…communication, kindness and making time for each other are so important.
Yes! Once the kids leave the nest you do not want to look at your spouse and say, “Who are you?”. Spending time together, in a meaningful way matters.
I love this list! Forgiveness is so important! I didn’t know how to do it or even what it meant until I met my husband and am forever grateful that he and our faith taught me how to forgive. It’s brought us so much closer together.
We practiced that early on in our relationship too. It makes the years that go by so much better!